this is a venting blog, read at your own risk.

question to self: why do i play soccer?
typical answer would be: because i like it, its fun.
my answer: i dont even know anymore.
i almost quit soccer yesterday. i'm desperate for some good advice.

my parents say they love me. i really dont feel like they do.
right now, i feel as though the only people in this world that care about me and actually love me are my friends. not my parents, marcus(?), not my brothers, not anyone else.

dont you hate it when all people do is talk about themself? none of you know the person i'm hinting at, but it bugs me. concietedness.

sometimes....i wonder why i'm still living? or what is there to live for? or what is my purpose on this earth? i wish i could just have an hour long conversation with God.

question of the month: what is love?
i wish someone could answer that for me.

sometimes, this life is like a bad dream. my friend's dad died totally unexpectadly. it was a freak accident. please pray for her family.

i wonder why some girls dress like sluts. do they not have any respect for their bodies? I just don't get it. that reminds me of Joel's devotion at camp and his doll.........i miss camp.

more questions: why did nikki sommer quit soccer? WHY WHY WHY?
why did God give my family a boy with downsyndrome?
how can some people live their lives without a care or a worry?
how do some live their lives without God?
why does it have to be our soccer team who always loses?
i just wish there was an answer to every one of my questions.

I wasnt there the day you filled up the ocean,
I didnt get to see you hang the stars in the sky.
I dont mean to second guess you,
or criticize what I dont understand.
These are just a few questions I have.